WISH IT WAS DIFFERENT

' ' ' I Promise, I swear to you, I’ll be okay. You’re only the love of my life ' ' '  

— Austin Post

/* Aparna is in New Delhi, she is done with her office conference and is on her way to the airport */

/* Utsav is already outside a restaurant at the airport waiting for her. He gives her a call */

Utsav: I am standing in front of the beer cafe, tu kahan hai?

Aparna: I am in the cab, I’ll be there in..

# looks at her phone

Aparna: 10 mins approximately

Utsav: Haan thik hai. I’ll get a table until then

Aparna: okay. 

# He goes in, gets a seat, waits for a little bit then starts playing subway surfer on his phone. 

# He’s doing a pretty bad job in the game

# In the meanwhile, Aparna steps into the restaurant and walks upto him 

Aparna: Kitnaa purana game hai! Ab toh khelna band kar de!?

# He looks up

Utsav: Purana ho gaya hai toh chod dun kya ab? 😀

# He gets up as he says this and gives her a tight hug

Aparna: Kaisa hai tu?

Utsav: Bas badiya! Mai toh sahi hun. But how are you? Eventful day, must be tired huh!?

Aparna: Yeah the conference wasss.. long  *takes a deep breath*

Aparna: Flight pe soungi ab 😁

# He gets up to get something to eat

Utsav: What do you wanna have?

Aparna: Actually I am not that hungry..

Utsav: Kuch toh lele? You’ll feel hungry baad me, I know..

Aparna: Nahi conference me kha liya tha..

# Confused

Aparna: Uhm, just get me a lime soda.

Utsav: Okay. 

# He goes to the counter to place the order

# She takes her phone out and starts scrolling, couple of minutes later she gets bored and keeps her phone aside.

# She sees Utsav’s phone lying on the table, She picks it up and sees that he’s got a wallpaper of them on his lock screen

# She stares at the pic for a while and starts reminiscing

# Utsav walks back a few minutes later along with drinks

Utsav: 4212 wohi code hai.

# He sits down

# She looks up at him and then passes him the phone

Aparna: Chomu dikh ra hai is pic me!

Utsav: Ab Udaipur me itni garmi thi mai kya karu?

Aparna: Hmmm

Utsav: Upar se mai bhi hot lol

Aparna: Hufff 😒 Why you so full of yourself?

Utsav: Look closely, I’m empty inside 😁

# Ignoring him

Aparna: How’s work going?

Utsav: Thik hi chal raha hai, kuch khas nahi.. its just the early morning meetings yaar 😔 jaan pe ata hai yaar calls lene ko 

Aparna: Kitne baje hote hain calls?

Utsav: 7 in the morning

Aparna: 😁 I can only imagine how you’re doing it!

Utsav: The good thing is that its only 2 days a week. How was your conference though?

Aparna: Surprisingly it went well actually, was long but, it went quite well. US k clients to kehe rahe the ‘why don’t you come work in the US? We could really use talented people like you!’.

Aparna: Maine bola ‘thank you, I am happy in India itself 😁’

Utsav: Really? They said that?

Aparna: Haan. Fir kehene laga ‘Let us know if you change your mind’ toh maine bola ‘my manager won’t let me go 😁’ 

Utsav: Aise thodi hota hai?

Aparna: Toh kehene laga ‘you dont worry about that, we’ll talk to him and get all the paper work started. You just let us know, if you’re interested?’

Aparna: Toh maine kaha ‘Okay thank you I’ll let you know but for now I am quite happy in India 😊’

Utsav: Arey bol k dekh na, wo kehe toh rahe hain pura paper work karenge!..

Aparna: Kya tu bhi!? Wo mazak me kehe raha tha aur tu seriously le raha hai!

Utsav: You won’t know until you try.. 🤷‍♂️

Aparna: Hmmmm…

# She sips her drink as she says that

Aparna: Wo toh hai

# Silence

Utsav: I don’t know yaar… 

Utsav: Ho payega ya nahi..

# She looks at him for a few seconds 

Aparna (with a smirk): Tu hamesha se yehi chahta tha na

Utsav: What?

Aparna: This was always a temporary thing for you, isn’t it?

Utsav: Don’t be ridiculous now!

Aparna: Achanak se??!

Utsav: Achanak se nahi hai yaar…

Aparna: Ab agar mere dad politics me hain toh ab mai kya kar sakti hun! Usme meri kya galati hai!?

Utsav (empathetic): Aparna.

Utsav: Maine bahut koshish ki hai mom dad ko samjhne.. and you know it. Mummi ya toh baat karna band kar degi, ya gussa ho jayegi ya fir ro degi, ab kya bolu mai..

Utsav: Maine khud frustrate ho ke chilla diya hai ek do baar… fir khudi bura lagta hai baad me 

# He looks down 

Utsav: Unhe hamesha se hi arrange marriage karani thi yaar meri

Aparna (slightly worked up): Toh pehele kyun nahi bola tune mujhe iske bare mai!!?

Utsav: Mujhe-

Aparna: Mai kya pagal baithi hun idhar!? Pehele hi khatam kar dete! Kise chaiye yeh sar dard!?

# Utsav looks at her with a straight face

Utsav: Mujhe khud 2 hafte pehele pata chala. Mere mama ne mujhe bataya, aur wahi batana cha raha tha mai tujhe last week. 

Aparna: Bhag chalein?

Utsav: Pagal hai kya?..

Utsav: Kahan jayenge? Kidhar rahenge?

Utsav (emphasizing): Aur khush rehe payenge kya? Tu rehe payegi apne mom dad ko dekhe bina.. Unse baat kiye bina?

# Aparna looks at him blankly

Utsav: Kabhi khushi kabhi gum chal rahi hai kya?

# He looks away

Aparna: What if.. my dad spoke to your parents?

Utsav: Mujhe bas darr hai ki… Mom kahin tere dad pe chilla na dein. Wo kahin bhi kuch bhi kehe deti hai, high blood pressure hai na. 

Utsav: Mai bas yeh nahi chahta k koi scene create ho jaye.. Teri family ko kuch ulta seedha na bol de mummi

Utsav: Isliye maine tujhe kabhi kaha nahi apne parents ko mere ghar lane.

Aparna: Aur tere papa..

Utsav (confessing): Papa ko koi problem nahi hai.

Utsav: Lekin papa bhi maa ko nahi mana pa rahe. 

# Silence

# Aparna looks down, she’s thinking hard

Aparna: Toh pehele tune kyun kaha tha ki “gharwale maan gaye hain aur papa milne ayenge teri family se kuch time baad”

Utsav: Mujhe laga papa mana lenge maa ko. Thodi koshish ki, lekin…

Utsav (giving up): Ab toh papa try bhi nahi karte.

# He looks down, dejected

# Aparna looks away

Aparna: Its almost as if you never wanted this to work

# Utsav looks at her for a few seconds

Utsav: Terko yaad hai 4th year me mid sem me mai ghar chala gaya tha?

Aparna: I remember..

Aparna: Your mom had a, heart attack.

Utsav: Mera bhai wo time pe ek relationship me tha. 

Utsav: 7-8 saal hue the, I think…

Utsav: Aur mummi ka favorite tha wo! Wo hota hai na ladla, ideal child 😁

Aparna: Hmm

Utsav: Wo tha

Utsav: So one day, he decided, maa ko bata dete hain… Mummi ko toh bilkul pasand nahi ayi baat. Unhone kaha, “nahi, hum chahate hain tumhari arranged marriage ho!”

Utsav: Aur dad bhi against the uske.  

Utsav: Shayad usko wo baat pasand nahi ayi, aur ek din wo ghar chod k bhaag gaya.. Aur shaadi kar li.

Utsav: Kuch din baad jab ghar walo ko malum chala toh.. Mom le nahi payi.. Aur unko heart attack aa gaya. 

# Silence

Aparna: Tune pehele kabhi bola kyun nahi!?.. K yeh reason tha.

Utsav: Maine kisi se bhi baat nahi ki hai iss bare me. Pata nahi, kabhi mann hi nahi kiya. 

Utsav: Koi puchta bhai k bare me toh kehe deta, “Haan thik hai wo, shaadi ho gayi uski, wagera..” zyada nahi baat karta tha mai uske bare me.

# He looks down

Utsav: Doctors ne toh kaha tha ki.. bahut hi serious attack tha.

Utsav: Fir se hua toh.. It could be really dangerous.

Utsav: Mai jab pahuncha toh mom ICU se discharge ho chuki thi. Kuch din raha mai unke saath, par hamesha sochta tha.. Kaise kar sakta hai bhai aisa!? Unne hamesha uska favor kiya hai hamesha uska support kiya hai.

Utsav: Usko jab Jammu jana tha cricket tournament k liye tab bhi maa ne hi uska support kiya, dad toh against the. Mom ne kaha, “Usko khelne ka mann hai na, khelne do, jane do usko.”

# Aparna looks at him unfazed

Utsav: Kuch dino baad mai university wapas aa gaya. Lekin.. Mujhe yeh nahi pata tha..

Aparna: Kya?

Utsav: Mere jane k baad mom depression me chali gayi. Bahut yaad karti thi bhai ko. 

Utsav: Toh papa ko laga, relative ayenge toh mahool badlega, mood badlega

Utsav: Relatives aye, aur unne kaha, “thik hai ek ladka gaya par dusra toh hai na. Wo kar lega tumhari pasand se shaadi.”

Utsav: I think, maa ne bhi socha aur.. fir, unki tabiyat thodi improve hone lagi

Utsav: Aur yeh baat mama ne merko, 2 hafte pehele batayi..

# Silence

Aparna: And your brother?

Utsav: He’s never come back.

Utsav: Bas facebook se pata chal jata hai kahan hai, kya kar raha hai.

# Silence 

Utsav: Its a risk..

Utsav: Its a risk… I… I can’t… take. 

Utsav: God forbid, if something happens tomorrow, if I marry you…

Utsav: I will not be able to forgive myself. When I know it could have been avoided.

Utsav: Aur papa ko bhi akela nahi chod sakta.

# Silence 

# Aparna stares at the table & zones out

# Utsav is quiet, playing with a fork. He takes a deep breath and looks away

# Silence

# Aparna snaps out, looks away, takes a deep breath & then looks at him

# He looks at her

# She reaches for his hand and squeezes it

Aparna: I understand.. 

# Takes a deep breath, gets up and leaves the restaurant and proceeds to the security gate

# Utsav is still sitting there, looking out the window lost in his own thoughts

— X —